ANGRY WITH MY ECZEMA, allergies, asthma, & chronic illness | Ep.210

By Adem Lewis / in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , /

hey it’s your friend Jeffrey Lin here. Not
feeling well today feeling nauseous weak all over and I’m flaring up look at
these bumps right here so am i angry with my eczema my allergies and
autoimmune problems and being sensitive to everything am i angry that the rain
is coming tomorrow and it just completely wiped me out so in this video
I want to talk about being angry with your chronic illness and how I deal with
it okay now from the beginning it’s Friday night I’m supposed to post a
video on Thursday I’ve been feeling horrible for the last two days dizzy my
heart’s beating funny and we really have to energy to stand up but am i angry
yeah you know I got this question a lot asking if my eczema makes me angry
because I’ve ruined my life and in gone 36 years where I missed out on so many
things and known behind so I do feel frustrated and you feel annoyed a lot of
times I do feel depressed especially the last couple years since I’ve been on the
immunosuppressant it’s like a sporran but I don’t really feel angry
ciao nothing are you nuts Jersey you really have got a lid on it
haven’t you what’s your secret mellow jazz bongo drums huge begley I
totally understand everything you guys are going it for you and a lot more when
you feel angry or justified eczema is the disease from hell it just it
literally feels like you’re being burned alive all the time and the itching is so
hard to deal with I would always scratch myself on my blood because the pain of
bleeding is better than itching while my eczema is probably the top 5
most extreme and yes and you know constant scratching all time and like my
hands never left my skin I was like trying to scratch all over my body when
we have two hands I didn’t really have enough hands to get anywhere just the
itching is just so frustrating and just so painful but in that same moment where
I’m just so focused on where to scratch and what’s itching I also have my
autoimmune Allergy Asthma disorder to deal with even right now my Airways are
swollen they’re really tight I don’t know if you can you hear it I’m
struggling to talk basically my whole life I’ve had a non-stop asthma attack
where I have to focus really hard on pushing and breathing and opening up my
chest and getting air in and out so between scratching I am so focused on
breathing that I don’t really have much time to think about anything else and if
I’m feeling a little bit better or if I’m going out I also have to pay
attention to every little thing that’s going on around me if somebody has a
cigarette or I gotta pay attention to my senses if somebody’s walking by with
perfume or animal dander or just there’s food that’s being cooked like half mile
away I can smell that and I’ll react to it
so my attention is always so focused on the sensations of my illness whether if
it’s eczema and itching or asthma or allergy reactions to every little single
thing around me like right now I’m sick because of the brain that’s coming
tomorrow I’ll react to things that’s coming in the future that haven’t
happened yet it’s like I’m driving on the edge of a cliff I’m so focused on
every little thing that’s going on I don’t have time to you know have
grievance or anger towards other people or the situation it’s just ain’t nobody
got time for that ain’t nobody got time for this
if I do have that little bit of mental bandwidth to think about something else
my mind doesn’t go to being angry or even being frustrated most time because
I do have so much to take care of and so much that I do want to do that my energy
go towards that so you know I would be scratching and peeling everywhere but my
mind will be on designing a graphic or reading my textbook and trying to catch
up because you know I was sick and I’ve already missed out on a lot of classes
so even though I wasn’t technically home-schooled I spent most of my days at
home learning on my own learning and doing other things and having work was
always a great distraction from my illness my mind is always on something
else other than the health problems that I’m facing down times the worst and
adrenaline leaves in your mind just starts to wander I haven’t thought about my family once
tonight thinking about him now like all the things I’m doing like working on fun
stuff that I like to do like design your video or studying so that I can catch up
or even get a head for academic reasons all of that stuff would help my
situation it might not help right now but it could help later on when I have
an opportunity or it’ll just increase my credentials so that when I do feel good
I can get a job or work on a project you see anger doesn’t change anything quite
frankly everybody else has an interest in sending you to the electric chair all
right you don’t seem alarmed would it help it doesn’t make your life
any better but the negative emotions will make it worse so there’s only a
downside to feeling angry because I’m finding out so many things I’m body is
burning so much energy and because I’m allergic to all foods in the world
I’m always malnutrition so I have a very limited energy and not much awake time
because I’m also tired and even less moments when I’m feeling well so the
time I know feeling well it’s so precious that I don’t have any time to
waste everybody get time for it but being
angry or even frustrated it’s just wasting time that I don’t have and if
you really feel like you’ve lost a lot every moment that you have that’s under
your control we can do something even if you’re sick even if you’re tired but if
you’re able to do anything at all if you’re able to think clearly at all you
try to move forward towards your goals instead of wasting it because if you do
that you will fall further behind and you’ll just get more angry about falling
behind and then you’ll fall further behind because you just not give me
anything productive if you’re angry and resentful the anger and resentment will
just add negativity to your life it’s not going to help you with anything at
all and even if your illness is cured someday your life will be filled with
challenges no matter what nobody escapes this all of us will die all of us will
have to deal with other challenges in our lives even if your illness start
healed you still need the mindset of the positive outlook and how to deal with
adversity and what to focus on and what not to focus on and what kind of
emotions you let out and what kind of emotions
you just stay away from like your mind can only focus on so many emotions and
thoughts at once so it’s not like oh you’re suppressing your anger if you’re
really into something like it said I’m really into studying or if I’m really
into doing projects there’s no mental bandwidth for negativity or anger you’ll
feel much better it’s not gonna solve all your problems but you feel so much
better four more days before I’m due for my
next big pillow map injection it’s been seven and a half weeks so I don’t know
if this flare-up and just being weak and sore and have you both part of my body
if that has something to do with just a pill map which girl I guess just been a
while so for all you do pill map excellent fans
the next video will be about he’s stabbing myself again

5 thoughts on “ANGRY WITH MY ECZEMA, allergies, asthma, & chronic illness | Ep.210

  1. “My next video will be about me stabbing myself again…” BAHAHA. I very much appreciate your humor because it’s so subtle and unexpected LOL. But yeah, you were right- I really did like this video. I can obviously definitely relate, and though I have had my dark moments, I’m mostly on the same wavelength as you. You got all kinds of inspirational and I love that. Life really is mind over matter and we do have control over our reactions to life. THANK YOU SO MUCH JEFFREY seriously a huge inspiration to me and moving forward with what I want to do. There really is no time to waste, especially for you and me because honestly with how bad our skin is, we don’t know when our last day will be. So time to make an impact and help others who are suffering like us. Thank you Chelsea for connecting us! Hopefully little by little, we can make the world a better place! or at least a place with more distracting laughter <3

  2. Hi Jeffrey
    My God Daughter has epsom salt Baths (magnesium sulfate) for her Eczema once every 2 days for about 2 months and has almost gone and the skin is shiny and healthy
    Hope you try this

  3. Hi, I’m so sorry I also suffer from eczema and I had it pretty bad a few years ago when my daughter was born and they recommend me to use the UV LIGHT THERAPY and it’s helped me sooo much i had to go 3 times a week to do the therapy but I had a bad case were I was lucky enough to get one sent to my home. At this moment my lips are really bad so I’m looking into purifiers (which your last video helped a lot thank you) I hope this works for you 😔

  4. i am quite scared. what’s gonna happen to me when i aged. I wish there are retirement villages for chronic patients in Singapore, by seems that’ll be the hospital.

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