Asian Parents Don’t Believe In Food Allergies – Nigel Ng – Standup Comedy
10
October

By Adem Lewis / in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , /


– And I went to a Malaysian
restaurant a few days ago down in Chinatown, right. I order my food and
then the waiter asked me if I had any food allergies. That’s not what we do back home. For street food? I you eat a peanut and die we just pack our shit up and cycle away. (audience laughs) Oh shit, leave the
chopsticks, lets go son. (audience laughs) Why’s he on the floor daddy? He’s just taking a nap man, (audience laughs) who gives a fuck? (audience laughs) Asian parents don’t even
believe in food allergies man. Right? My parents don’t believe in that shit. You tell parents you have a
peanut allergy they’ll be like, no, no, no, no, no, no such thing. They’re only strong people and
then there are weak people. (audience laughs) How can you be a man if a
peanut if a peanut fucks you up? (audience laughs) If peanut kill my son,
I have no son, alright? (audience laughs) Walk it off, pussy! (audience laughs) And what the fuck is gluten? (audience laughs) Had to tell parents I
had hay fever last summer and that’s the closest I felt
to coming out the closet. (audience laughs) I have something important to say mom, trees make me sneeze, (audience laughs) please don’t Sharpie me
off the family photos. (simulates pen squeaking)
(audience laughs) Who’s that dark figure? Oh we don’t talk about him anymore. (audience laughs) He needs Benadryl. (audience laughs) Summer fucked him up. (audience laughs) My dad doesn’t believe in
antibiotics either man, he thinks it’s cheating,
your body has to learn how to fend for itself. I’m like, that’s not
how chlamydia works dad. (audience laughs) I can’t just walk that off, okay? (audience laughs)


14 thoughts on “Asian Parents Don’t Believe In Food Allergies – Nigel Ng – Standup Comedy

  1. My dad has a few allergies so it's acceptable in my family,no one outside the house believes in allergies tho 😂

  2. My friends mum thinks people have peanut allergies because they don’t eat enough peanuts. If only they ate MORE peanuts then they’d be fine…

  3. I have an allergy to aloe vera and dandelions, my Asian parents decide to let me chill outside in spring and buy me aloe vera based lotions, body wash, and hair products

    that wasn't a very nice time

  4. There’s this one story
    So an Asian guy with his mom was eating with his family. He was allergic to Asian food and his Asian mom tried to force him to eat it. She didn’t believe in food allergies. Family dinner was of course, Asian food. His mom gave him a bowl of it and at that moment, he had enough. he was allergic to it and he had to make sure that his mom never gave it to him again. After he ate it up, he threw up all over his mom in front of the whole family and that got her really embarrassed. His mom never fed him Asian food again

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