Bill Burr Reacts to Comedians’ Stories About Getting Cheated On, Teen Pregnancy & More – The Ringers
06
February

By Adem Lewis / in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , /


– Mega Church has been
around long enough. – Oh, they’ve been
around for a while. – They were actually
doing that thing you know where they
touch you in the face? – Yeah, they’ll like
slay you in the spirit. That’s what they call it. – So you worked at one of
my favorite restaurants of all time. – Yeah. – In-N-Out. Free advertisement. – Yeah, yeah, my dad would dress
up with the platform shoes, the bellbottom pants. (Bill laughs) – He had the Afro going. (rock music) – When you were a
kid you found out you were allergic
to trees and grass? – Yeah, yeah it was like
all of a sudden too. I was in fourth grade and it happened in
the middle of the day. – So you’re like nine years old you lived almost your
first decade on the planet, going outside is not a problem? – Yeah it was great. I loved it. – [Bill] And then
out of nowhere? – Yeah it was all I
was allowed to do too. It was like couldn’t watch
TV ’cause it was like bad and the devil, so playing outside
was all we had to do. – Right. – And then out of nowhere
nope couldn’t breath. Like falling on the ground
and shit, it was insane. – Like thinking you were
going to die or something? – Yeah, yeah. – So what did they do? – I had to get shots every week. And for the first few months they had to find
out what it was. ‘Cause they were like well
this kid can’t breath. And this was what the 90’s? So no one knew anything, so they were like
putting like 40 shots. (Bill laughs) – ‘Cause they didn’t know
they’re just like that’s a– – 40? – Yeah, they’d put ’em,
it was on like a big thing and they would like stick
the whole thing in my entire, like from the knee
to the thigh place. – Oh, they got it over with? – Yeah, so they’d put like 40 in and they’d be like alright
whichever ones swell up, you’re allergic to that. So they’re just injecting me with random shit it was like
here’s a little bug thing. – What did that feel
like 40 shots at once? – Bad! It was getting hurt. It was like blood. – Did you get use
to it after awhile? – No! (laughs) – I’m trying to find
a silver lining here, you’re like no it’s
horrible it hurt. – No, some things are just bad. It was bad. – So were you like kicking and screaming on the
way down there and stuff? Like I don’t want
to do this anymore? – No, I mean my dad kind of
nailed all that incorrect stuff in my head of like crying,
never never do that. (laughs) – Oh, you had a hardcore
religious background, huh? – Yeah, yeah. – So TV was the devil. – TV was the devil. – Where did you grow up? – Outside of Atlanta,
rural Georgia. – Yeah. – So it was like Seinfeld which now is considered clean
that’s like a clean show. And they were like that’s too Everybody Loves
Raymond was too dirty. Everything was too dirty
or too liberal or like– – Caroline in the
City, how about that? – I don’t even know what
you’re talking about they must have really hid that. What’s going on in that? – She’s in the
city she’s single. She has ideas. – Is Caroline, is
she the little nun is she the little nun girl? – No, that was one
of those shows that I always used as a reference
because that was just like somehow this show
made it to syndication and I’ve never seen
an episode of it somebody is watching this thing it just became like fascinating. – Yeah. – So what are you are
you religious now? Did you get away from it? – No, but I’m definitely
open to all everything. They all sound
fun, most of them. – So what religion were you? – Pentecostal Holiness. – Which is what? – They speak in
tongues and those ones. – Is that Jesus shit or is that? – Yeah, Jesus. – I don’t know. (laughs) – So you worked at one of
my favorite restaurants of all time. – Yeah. – In-N-Out. Free advertisement. – What was that like? – It was the best thing
arguably of my life. Until now. – I was gonna say. – It’s been like
this and In-N-Out. Pretty much top two. – Did you go nuts on the food? – I mean I was in a real
grilled cheese phase at that time not a vegetarian, but like have you ever
had the grilled cheese? – I didn’t know they made one. – It’s unreal. – Really? – Unreal. – ‘Cause I know the double
double animal style. I know you got all the cheat
codes you gotta let me know like this is the one you can order that just has
the lettuce and not the bun. – I mean that’s pretty like– – Standard. – No, that’s pretty out there. Yeah, that information
is out there. But, I do like a grilled
cheese and a root beer float. – Root beer float and
you like Bob Seger? (laughs) – Yeah. – I didn’t know they made
women like you anymore? That’s unbelievable. – Yeah. – No wonder you’re
having panic attacks you’re living in the wrong time. (laughs) – Yeah. – You’re like some chick I
went to high school with. (laughs) – I peaked at In-N-Out it was
just so fun I just loved it. I worked there in high school. – But, you said the first night something crazy happened there? – I mean, so I
dated this guy there ya know, whatever, it’s like
you’re there all the time? – You were soulmates, right? – Yeah. – You guys both know the menu. – I was 16 and he was 18 it
was just like let’s do this. (laughs) – And I realized slowly like
on a couple of our shifts he was like kinda like
being stand offish and I was like okay
like did I like take an order wrong
what’s happening? And then I realized that
he was cheating on me with a different employee that had just started
working there. And it was just I mean, yeah, devastating doesn’t
even begin to cover it. Then we just have to all
stand there at the registers make fries ya know and like– – Wait did you find out at work? – Yeah. Yeah. Because he came. I was standing
outside taking orders ’cause I was the best at it. Ya know when people
go outside to like get the drive thru line? So I was outside
it’s like 10 o’clock on a Tuesday and he pulled
up, he wasn’t working. And I was like what are
you doing here, ya know? And I knew he wasn’t there
to see me, I knew it. I was like going through my mind I was like who’s
inside right now? – But he didn’t check with
you to see if you were there? This kid’s sloppy. – He didn’t even check with me. – Sloppy. – Yeah. I’m the first person he sees and he was like I’m going
to check my schedule. Yeah right? – In the drive thru line? – Have you ever
heard of the phone? Yeah, and I’m like dude
something’s up you know? And I was thinking
about who was in there and it was just like
Manny, Caesar, no. And then I was like– – Not feeling that vibe? – I was like Louise, no
no no then it hit me. Leah… The new girl. – Wow. – And yeah they confirmed it at we used to have store
meetings once a month, and like at the
next store meeting they were like sitting together
in the booth and I was like. Yeah. – So there was no
official break up? – No. – That’s the worst
when you’re young you don’t know how to do it. – Yeah, yeah. – And you had to
keep working there? So what happened? Who quit? Who left? – He did. I was the longest one
still working there. – So he left and she stayed? So then the two of
your were there? – He left and then she left and then I was just
like running the joint. (laughs) – You gotta start writing
for soap operas that was– (laughs) – It was traumatizing, yeah. – First of all you lived a life. – Yeah, yeah you know
married and all that. – Yeah, then like so
much of your comedy was coming from the
characters and your dad like I had a really volatile dad too, and so much of your stuff
comes from that like– I don’t know man I guess
tell me about yourself. – Just that’s the best
comedy real life stuff, huh? I’m from the south
side of Chicago 40 years old been doing
standup for 14 years now. I base everything, everything
I write to make people laugh is all the stuff I
went through as a kid. Crazy dad. – And you had kids like
real young too, right? – Yeah I was 19 years old when we had our
first daughter, man. – So you got a 21 year old? – 21 year old. She’ll be 21 in September. – Dude I’m 50 I
got a 2 year old. – I feel bad for you man. (laughs) – I know anytime
I talk to parents that have already raised kids
they just kinda like oh yeah. – Yeah my best
friend is like 42, he’s got a newborn he’s like
miserable everyday man, but… – I’m liking it. I’m liking– – He’s liking it too he’s
got a beautiful daughter, but when he sees me hanging
out and following my dream and what not he’s just like shit I should have got her
knocked up at 19 too. (laughs) – I thought getting your
girl knocked up young that usually screws
it up, doesn’t it? – At that moment it screwed
up a lot of stuff you know I had college dreams– – Yeah that went out the window. – That went out the
window, full time job– – What did you think
at 19 when she goes on, probably 18 if
you had her at 19? – She was actually
18 I was 19, yeah. – You were 19 and
then you had the kid what are you thinking? What did I just do? – Honestly, it was weird
because at that time in my life I was in high school
all my friends had kids. Like a bunch of my friends
had kids it was insane. – You city kids, man. – Yeah bunch of horny
little Latino kids from the inner city, man. (laughs) – It was like a
cool thing to do. – Trying to stay warm. – Two guys show up I
got a baby, I got a baby you know I need a
fucking baby now. So it was one of
those things, man. – Oh yeah and then
the baby comes and you’re like oh
shit what do I do? – Now I really have to
get married or ya know? You got a choice you
can run or you can stay. I decided to stay. – So how many you have? – Two. Two daughters. My youngest is 17. – Your youngest is 17 so she was born when
you were like what 20– – 22. – 22. 23. – 22 or 23 years old. – Wow. – She was born in 2002. – So tell me about your dad your dad is a big
Rock and Roll fan? – Yeah, yeah my dad is a he’s
literally an encyclopedia of Rock and Roll I mean– – That’s so cool. – He can name
drummers, guitarists, even like replacement artists he can name all the
original Black Sabbath guys and then the new guys. He’s one of those guys. – He’s hardcore, huh? – Hardcore, he played
guitar for a few years. – And you were saying he
use to dress up and stuff? – Yeah, yeah my dad would dress
up with the platform shoes, the bellbottom pants. (Bill laughs) – He had the Afro
going, ya know? – How is he liking that
you are doing stand up and telling all those
stories about him, is he cool about it? – Oh yeah, he’s cool about it my dad he’s always been the like if he was in this bar he would
be buying everybody drinks. He’s always been the guy– – Oh he’s one of those guys. – Yeah, I got paid today guys and spends all his money
and shit in the bar, but he’s always been that guy that wanted the whole
room to look at him kinda. – Yeah. – You know Phil’s the
funniest one here so– – So you think you
got that from him like as far as you
then getting on stage and wanting to be a comedian. – Not in the sense where my
dad does it for attention. – Right. – I mean my dad always did it
like he wanted to be the star. What I got from him is the
funniness and the wittiness. – Right. – Not afraid to just
say what you feel when you see something even
if it assaults somebody else. – That’s why when I
was watching your stuff I related to you so much because
I had a dad just like that. He was a little more
introverted like my dad either wants to be
the center of attention or just wants to be left
alone, one or the other. – Right. – But what was cool was
when you get nervous when you start talking
about your folks and stuff like how
are they gonna react. – Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. – My dad loves it. The craziest stories I tell he’ll just lean over and
go “Yeah that’s true.” – Yeah that’s my dad. He’s exactly right. I did that shit. (rock music)


100 thoughts on “Bill Burr Reacts to Comedians’ Stories About Getting Cheated On, Teen Pregnancy & More – The Ringers

  1. chase bernstein lowers the tone of her voice before every pause on her dialogue, it made me think of louie's impression of young women. kinda spot on hahahaha

  2. long time fan first time caller.. Jesus H Christ what are you doing here Bill? Take a page out of Chapelles book. Walk away from this kind of shit man.

  3. it is all to dirty, its been a non ending desensitizing to the things that are wrong and inappropriate. the blindness of people will never cease to amaze me.

  4. I am from the year 2027, I came back to prove to my kids that bill burr tried to do hard hitting interview show. He actually pretended to care about other people's stories…LOL I know right? You can almost hear the money he is making for this in his voice.

  5. Is it just me or has every form of entertainment gotten increasingly watered down since the internet's popularity grew? Norm Macdonald cited Robert Klein as saying that when he started, there were 50 stand-ups, and five were funny; suddenly, there were 500 comedians, and five were funny. Now the ratio is something like 500,000 to five.

  6. I grew up in a Pentecostal home my parents did the same thing. I never got pop culture jokes until I was at least 19-22 when I had seen everything I missed basically😅🥴

  7. Bill burr presents- targeting older audiences with a watered down, this is not happening. I love all of the comics though. I wish they each had a hour to themselves

  8. haha this girl I worked with… well she was in another department.. I worked in the business department… she was an attractive young African American.. anyway.. she would always talk to me.. her & her friend.. & she would flirt a bit, nothing overly dramatic.. but nice enough to the point I ask her out.. so she says… why don't you come to church with me first.. so .. being a Catholic.. I'm game sure.. I get to her church.. & the sermon is being broadcast to them.. I think from Africa.. & then in person this "spiritual healer" shows up.. & then she was sitting next to me but she tells me early on she is going to assist at the church.. oh my.. then they bring up this older woman & she claims to have this illness & then they do their spiritual healing bit & she, the girl I'm with, catches her & all that… then after church.. she's asking me if I believed it all & I say.. no.. of course not.. I'm Catholic… & I could go into detail but.. our miracle worker is Jesus.. & since he wasn't there…. … anyways… copycats.. that's what I consider the other churches… haha.. the Mormons… the Baptists… the Church of England… Lutherans… .. besides.. Martin Luther, the guy who founded the Lutheran Religion.. broke off.. he was a Scorpio.. think of all the big Scorpios you know….. Bill Gates… Weird Al… I could go on… if these people wanted to.. they could start their own thing pretty easily… point being.. this girl was trying to play me for a fool… & take my money.. then after church what does she want me to do ???? ….. change her fucking tire.. so I do that.. in my church clothes whatever.. I could give a damn myself… she needed it.. and that tire was hard to remove too… anyways… after all of that.. & her Bert stare telling me it was all real.. left me thinking.. no way.. I'm done with this girl… & I find out later a bit more about her & of course oddly enough she quits the job there & starts working elsewhere… & then I see her a couple more times just randomly in town.. even though it isn't a small town.. she approaches me.. there could have been something there but…… oh & don't even get me started on women cheating haha

  9. ALL OF THESE 'COMEIDANS': i have dyslexia, i'm allergic to grass, my anus bleeds when i eat strawberry… seems like they have to talk about some so called disability to hide how unfunny they are, BURR must see right through this shit…

  10. You do not hit women…unless they are fascist whores like Johanna Alvater and Gertrud Scholtz-Klink were or if they are about to psychologically or physically abuse children, other women or men…or about to kill them.

  11. This has potential but the flow is jarring and hard to follow for storytelling. It’s hard to get as immersed as a podcast.

  12. Well I learned something new today again. Never knew the word vocal fry and what it is. Never noticed that in peope either. It's like the western world makes up diseases and conditions out of boredom. But then again nobody in Eastern Europe speaks like that, so… thanks, Bill.

  13. This is a new side of Bill. I don't know if I like it. He obviously has mellowed down the last year but this makes me think he is on a sort of 12 step program thing that makes him want to give back and help other comedians. I'm probably just cynical.

  14. I fucking love this set up, I love the realness pain and lows/high also I got allergic to alot of shit after I got chronically ill

  15. I love Bill. I like all these people and their stories. I do not care for the way this was filmed and edited just saying. It feels too “inside story dramatic dr phucking Phil Oprah ish.

  16. God damn that vocal fry killed the whole video.
    Ol' Freckles must have had his hearing aid turned down to make it through that one

  17. “It was the 90s so I got 40 shots” I remember about a decade ago I had to get 50 on my back to see what I reacted to, torture

  18. I had 80 at once, 40 on each arm, and then I had to wait for 20 minutes without itching. I was allergic to just about everything except Hamsters. HAMSTERS. Great. It was painful but the itching and not being able to was much worse.

  19. HE HAD PROBLEMS BREATHING DUE TO THE GEO ENGINEERING PROGRAM SPRAYING MORE CHEMICALS IN THE SKIES AND IT IS STILL HAPPENING TODAY. SO THERE WILL BE EVEN MORE BREATHING ISSUES FOR US ALL. WE ALL NEED TO RAISE OUR VOICES AND STOP THIS PROGRAM. IT IS CAUSING MORE HEALTH ISSUES AND NOT PROTECTING US LIKE THEY CLAIM

  20. Bill Burr you sell out. At least a garbage man is genuine an actually picks up the trash without a forced interested act you dirtbag; we knew you'd sell that low dollar red devil soul to high paying filler rat trash Comedy Central to launch your new ACTING intrested. You scab I'm glad I still like David Spade even though he's sold out to. But at least he's a stand-up comedian, crappy Comedy Central sell-out that's been in good movies where he acts.

    You remember when you were decent and used to act on real shows like Chappelle Show for Comedy Central

  21. Allergy tests don’t hurt. But I get it. Comedy is the truth…exaggerated. About the rest of what he said, I believe it. I grew up a Jehovah’s Witness (another Christian fundamentalist cult) and…everything that wasn’t an activity that benefited them, was a sin or an affront against God. Also, they believe that only Jehovah’s Witnesses will survive Armageddon and live on a Paradise Earth where the lion, the tiger, the leopard…will all eat grass and be completely tame. Everyone will live for ever and not get old and everyone that dies before Armageddon without ever finding out about the Jehovah’s Witnesses or every one that was a Jehovah’s Witness and died “in the Truth” before Armageddon will also be resurrected. Every one else that dies not being a Jehovah’s Witness at Armageddon….(which would be most of the 5 Billion plus living today) will be killed by Jehovah at Armageddon…forgedda bout it…they are gone forever, no resurrection for them…
    How does anyone believe this bleep!?
    😳🇨🇺🇺🇸

  22. 4:05 "I just luuuuvvedd eehhht. I worked there in Haaeeeey Skweeewl" I was like whaaaart is she like saying like yar right like somethings up

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