FUNNIEST JAPANESE COMMERCIALS | Jacksepticeye’s Funniest Home Videos
22
October

By Adem Lewis / in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , /


*murders whiteboard* Jack: “L A U G H !” Jack: “Yes, yes; hello, everyone! Hi, everyone; yes!” Jack: “Welcome back to ‘Jacksepticeye’s Funniest Home Videos™’ ” Jack: The only YouTube show to be nominated for 12 Oscars” Jack: “Including: ‘Best Actor’ ” Jack: “Best….” Jack: “Roll the intro!” *the intro (aka stupid trumpet noises)* Jack: “I, I don’t have an intro for this series” Jack: “It’s…This is the intro”. *awkward silence* Jack: *sigh* “Fuck….” Jack: “Let’s create our own theme song for it then” *intro (aka trumpet noises)* Jack: *giggling* “Comedy!” Jack: “Today, we are going to be looking at some things” Jack: “that we have looked at before, which are Japanese commercials” Jack: “more specifically, funny and weird and cool Japanese commercials” Jack: “The last time we saw some weird shit” Jack: “and I got 7 million packages of graphite from people so…thank you for that” Jack: “we have, we have solved the graphite shortage crisis” *laughing* Jack: “Turns out if you just need it come to my house; I can sell it to you for” Jack: “for a HIGH price” *in a bit deeper voice* “Whadda ya buying?” Jingle: “Instead of imagining… (x 3)” Jack: “Okay”
Jingle: “Instead of imagining…” Jingle: “Ins-tead of i-ma-gi-ning; i-ma-gi-ning (x 2)” Jingle: “I-ma-gi-ning; gi-ning (x 2)”
*on screen*: “What do you (want to) play with?” Announcer: “D’Station” (it’s an ad for the Pachinko parlor “D’Station”; “pachinko” is a Japanese gambling device resembling a pinball machine but with automatic payoff, as in a gambling slot machine) Jack: “pfff what?” *laughing* Jack: “Wha- what the fuck?” Jack: “What were you selling? Wait, is this part of this one or the next one?” (it’s part of the next one, which is an ad for canned coffee) Jack: “Wonda – wonderful coffee” Jack: “Oh, maybe that’s what it was” Jack: “You drink- you know what happens when you drink coffee” Jack: “You come outside of yourself and you get wings and you fly away” *music* Girls: “Hey!”
Girl: “(Have a) ‘red’ in the morning!” (“red” refers to the color of the coffee label) Jack: “Oh no, that’s- this coffee…okay”
Girls: “Yo!”
Girl: “(Have a) ‘red’ in the morning!” Girls: “Ta-da!”
Jack: “Okay”
Girl: “(Have a) ‘red’ in the morning!” Jack & announcer & on screen: “(Have a) ‘red’ in the morning!” Announcer & on screen: “Dedicated to mornings – morning shot ‘Wonda’ ” (“Wonda” (wonderful) is a canned coffee brand) Jack: “I don’t want that” *a lil laugh* Jack: “If I’m walking down the street I don’t want Japanese girls bursting through the wall and being like ‘HEY DRINK SOME COFFEE!’ ” Young man: “(On music.jp) you can get one of your favorite songs a day for one year every day”
Jack: “Uh huh” Young man: “Now, by something as surprising as that, I’m…” Jack: “Don’t give me those eyes”
Young man: “…astonished” Jack: “You know they turn me on – oh god” *dies of laughter*
Young man: “Dad?” Jack: “Okay, I see exactly why you’re giving those eyes now. That definitely turns me on” Jack: “Look at those knees” *wooooooow* Announcer: music.jp Jack: “Why? What was the point of that- why a- why?” *laughs* Jack: “ohhhhhaaaaah” Jack: “This is gonna get really weird- I’m working on like 3 hours of sleep, man” Jack: “I went to bed and I woke up and my body was like ‘yeah that’s enough’ ” Jack: “pff SON OF A BITCH!!!!” Jack: “WHY?” Wife: “Don’t use your wife’s (my) shampoo!”
Husband: “Huh?” Wife: “Fashion that men can’t see can make women…” *Japanese hand drum (tsuzumi) sound effect* Wife: “… do the boogie-woogie”
Husband: “Give me a 100 (bottles of) Rigaos” (“Rigaos” is a shampoo brand for men) Announcer: “Males need male scalp care” Jack: “You know what?”
Annoucer: “All males-” Jack: “I don’t even want to know what you’re saying. I don’t even know if that would help. I don’t think that it would help… to know what you’re saying” Jack: “All i know is that you just walked into his house and was like” Jack: “Hey,”
Wife: “Wife’s shampoo”
Jack: “y’all motherfuckers like bubbles?” Jack: “Is that his sister? His mom? His lover?” Jack: “No one will know” Jingle: “I will find it – your unique ‘motivation switch’!” Announcer: “Mother, please leave it to School IE” (it’s an ad for an individualized education (IE) school) *slow-mo poke sound*
*on screen*: Individual guidance – School IE Jack: “Okay, maybe it’s just the sleep deprivation… I don’t know what’s happening” *laughs* Jack: “Don’t you just hate it when your mom poke ya in the face, all slow like” Jack: *laughs* “Did that go on long enough?” *laughs* Jack: *brutally murders marker and board* “LAUGH!!” Jingle: “Yellow hat (x 2)” (Yellow Hat is a Japanese retailer of automobile accessories) Jack: “Oh, I’ve had a nightmare like this”
Jingle: “(We have a) lot of tires” Jack: “I- I’ve seen this before”
Jingle: “Yellow hat (x 2)” Jack: “I’m uncomfortable”
Jingle: “(Our) installation is careful” Jack: “Don’t look at me like that!”
Jingle: “If you choose a tire” Jack: “What the fuck is going on?”
Jingle: “(choose) Yellow Hat” Jack: “I’m assuming that there’s a company called ‘Yellow Hat’ that fixes tires or something” Jack: “Otherwise, I have no idea what’s happening” Man: “These gyoza with ‘wings’ look delicious!” (called “Hanetsuki Gyoza” (羽根つき餃子) in Japanese)
Waiter: “Please (help yourself)!” Man: “Ah, then, thank you for the foo-”
Editor-in-chief: “Leave this to me!”
Man: “The editor-in-chief is…!” Jack: *laughs*
Man: “…excitingly…” Man: “… eating it!” Jack: *laughs*
Man: “(And she’s) wonderfully…” Man: “…drinking it!” Editor-in-chief: “It goes well (with the food)!” Announcer: “It’s ‘okay’ (goes well) with meals – Strong Zero Dry” (Strong Zero Dry is a lightly-sweetened (“dry”) chūhai (fizzy canned drink with high alcohol content) ) *on screen*: nonsweet chūhai (different than Strong Zero Dry)
Editor-in-chief: “It doesn’t go well (with the food)!” Jack: *laughs* “That was fucking impeccable!” Jack: “That was incredible; I love that!” Man: “She’s eating it!” Jack: “Ahh, that’s my type of comedy: just crazy” *shooow* Jack: “Ooooh, tickle me pink!” Man: *slurps* “As I thought, this is it!” Curry rice: “Wait a minute!” Jack: *laughs*
Curry rice: “Curry rice is better than cup noodles!” Kid: “Hot water!” Curry rice: “You only need to pour hot water here!” Curry rice: “Wait 5 minutes and it’s done!” Jack: “The poor man; he just wanted to eat his noodles”
Curry rice: “You don’t need to stir it to make it taste good” Curry rice: “It’s easy to make (someone) eat it because you don’t need to slurp it”
Jack: “Oh, Jesus” Kid: “It’s delicious!” Curry rice: “Which one do you prefer: noodles or rice?”
*everyone raises a “rice” (メシ) sign, except for the elderly man* Elderly man: “Noodles!” (he still wasn’t convinced)
*raises a “noodles” (メン) sign* Curry rice: “Hey, hey, at least have a first bite!” Jack: “What is going on?”
Man: “Wow, what is this feeling?” Jack: “What the fu- hahahahahaha”
Man: “I was wrong~” Curry rice: “Rice is better than noodles! Curry rice!” Jack: “FUG YEAH!!” Jack: “I want these noodles; I need them in my life” Jack: “That was 28 seconds of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen in my life” Man: “As I thought, this is it!” Curry rice: “WAIT A MINUTEEEEE!” Jack: *yelling in Japanese* “WAIT A MINUTEEEE!” Jack: “Again, I just love it: as soon as you yell at me, I’m yours” *on screen*: One day, in the morning Lyrics: Sometimes I want to know how Jack: “Ahhhww”
Lyrics: the world Jack: “ohoho no”
Lyrics: comes by Jack: “the poor horse”
*on the cell phone*: Amazon Prime – buy immediately with 1 click – express delivery – free (of charge) *on screen*: on the following day Jack: “Yeah hehehehehhahah”
*on screen*: hula hoop – express delivery is free (of charge) Jack: “That’s the- capitalism: Amazon Prime can make you a better person” Jack: “Most of the stuff in my room has been bought with Amazon Prime” Jack: “I think I was born on Amazon Prime” Piko Tarō : “I have a fanta”
Jack: “No!” Piko Tarō: “I have a lemon”
Jack: “No!” Piko Tarō: “I have a ‘C’ ”
Jack: “No!” Piko Tarō: “Uh uh uh – fanta lemon +C” Jack: “THAT DOESN’T WORK! IT’S STUPID!”
*on screen*: Lemon Jack: “IT’S STUPID!” Jack: “I have a bottle” Jack: “I have a hand” Jack: “I have a ‘please stop making this meme’ ” Jack: “bottle, hand, please stop making…STOP!!! Jack: “Whaddup gamers!?” Jack: “Where we dropping?” (x 3) Lady: “Hey, Ken. Let’s marry?” Man: “Let’s!” Man: “Let’s get very flashy” Jack: “That fucking escalated quick”
Man: “(Let’s get) the biggest diamond in the world” Lady: “(Let’s have) an unexpected… birth of a giant ladybug” Man: “(That would be) the best!” *swallows sashimi* Man: “On second thought, we’d better give up” Lady: “Yeah, we’re not smart enough” Jack: “What?”
Announcer: “Tuna contains DHA” (DHA is a fatty acid good for the brain) Announcer: “Silver Plate” (Silver Plate is a Japanese sushi delivery company)
*on screen*: “Fresh tuna is Silver Plate” Jack: “Okay, I’m legitimately out of words” Jack: “What the fuck happened?” Jack: “Okay, you wanted to eat sushi together…Maybe…I dunno….Whatever you do in your spare time with the privacy in your own home” Jack: “but all of a sudden you’re married? You jump out of your own cake, cool, I’m up to speed on that one” Jack: “relationship progressed a little fast, but whatever, maybe you’re just flashing back to when you were together” Jack: “All of a sudden you have a diamond the size of some people’s houses” Jack: “It concentrates the sun into a beam…” Jack: “…that lands on a ladybug, that makes the ladybug massive, …” Jack: “…and then I’m assuming that this is a conversation where you question your love for each other, and you’re probably gonna get a divorce” Man: “On second thought, we’d better give up”
Lady: “Yeah, we’re not smart enough” Announcer: “Tuna contains DHA” (DHA is a fatty acid good for the brain) Jack: “Yeah, I- that’s exactly what it was. Yeah, the sushi ended their marriage, maybe because they ate the sushi and it made them hallucinate?” Jack: “and then they realized they could do better than each other- I dunno” Jack: “Okay, looking good so far” *music* Jack: “Yeah!” *music continues as Jack dances* Jack: “This is just a good time!” *on screen*: What color are you? Jack: “I dunno what this is” (Lumica is a Japanese manufacturer of glow light products) Jack: “Were- were you selling those lights?” Jack: “I need to get me some of those so I can do the” *dances* Jack: “You can’t see my legs as well, I’ll get something for that too- I’ll get a leg cam for the next video” Jack: *slams table* “Genius idea! No one else has done it. First.” Lady: “You can’t do the impossible!” Jack: “Oh God” *laughs*
Man: *singing* “We can do it! (x 3) Do!” Lady: *singing* “If you can believe it, everything is possible”
Jack: “What?” Everyone: *singing* “Think of any dreams you want to make come true – anything!”
Jack: “Oh it’s a- that was a Metal Gear Solid arm; i get it” Man: *singing* “We can do it!”
Everyone: *singing* “We can do anything!” Everyone: *singing* “We can do whatever we really wanna do”
Jack: “Oh, God, I did not like that” Everyone: *singing* “We can be whatever we really want to beeeee” Everyone: *singing* “Anything!” Jack: Is this really a Playstation ad in Japan? (yes, it’s a PS4 ad)
Everyone: *singing* “We can do it! (x 2) Everything!” Everyone: *singing* “We can do it! (x 2) !” Everyone: *singing* “We can do whatever we really want to do” Jack: “What the fuck is happening- He just punched a dinosaur into the wall!”
Everyone: *singing* “We can be whatever we really want to beeee” Everyone: *singing* “We can do whatever we really want to do” Jack: “Trico!”
Everyone: *singing* “We can be whatever we really want to beeee” Everyone: *singing* “Yes, we can do…” Everyone: *singing* “…anything!”
Jack: “Sweet mother of God, this commercial is insane!”
*on screen*: Doing what’s impossible is the best Man: “Yes!” Jack: “Yes, give me! I- I’m gonna throw my- here’s my wallet- just-” *gets attacked by wallet* “Fuck!” *laughs* “Jesus!” Jack: “That’s not supposed to happen- here- take- take- take my money. That was the joke. Ow!” *laughs* Jack: “Now I gotta clean my money off the ground” Jack: “I have to clean my money off the ground because I have so many of it” Jack: “I need to clean all of that hundreds of thousands *stutters* of dollars off the ground” Jack: “Because I’m a Youtuber and we have lots of money” Jack: “What’s that, Mr. ‘person who works at the bank for me’ ? Yes, buy the third boat. I need another one” Jack: “Also, I need that arm, just so like- if someone across the room is talking while you’re in the cinema or out at dinner and you’re just like ‘cha ch poof shhhUT THE FUCK UP!’ ” Security officer: “Open!” Jack: “Oh, please be something weird inside. Please be, like, a person” Jack: “What i-” Chicken dolls: “Waaaaaaaaaaar” (they say “Uō” (ウォー), which is the Japanese pronunciation of “war”)
Jack: *laughs* “YES!” Announcer: “Smartphone RPG – Summoners …”
Chicken dolls: “…Waaaaaaaaaaar” (it’s an ad for the mobile game “Summoners War: Sky Arena”) Jack: “I mean… I do wanna play that RPG now, because of this commercial, so… you’re- you’re ahead of the game, Japan” Jack: “That was even better than I could have expected it to be” Jack: ” I wanted to buy these…” Jack: “when they came out- remember when the meme and everything came out of them, and it all went viral and everything a couple years ago” Jack: “I really wanted to buy them, but… I- I don’t think I could get them shipped to Ireland at the time” Jack: “and now I don’t think they make them anymore” (you can still get them in many places) Jack: “So… if any of you have a link to be able to buy these chicken things, please let me know!” Jack: “i want to hug them all and let them scream…” Jack: “…that’s what it sounds like to listen to a Jacksepticeye video” Chicken dolls: “Uooooooooooo” Lady: “Huh?” Cat: “Hello, I’m the little grumpy cat” Piko Tarō: “And I’m little Tarō!” Jack: “Ahhh, fuck off, no!” Lady: “Small?”
Jack: “Go away!” Jack: “What do you have this time?”
Piko Tarō: “Ah!” Piko Tarō: “You can get a ‘little grump’ ” (A “Little grump” (fute puchi) is a lightly-flavored small-potato candy ) Jack: “Okay, it’s a different song, so that’s better”
Piko Tarō: “You can get a ‘little grump’ ” Cat: “Little”
Piko Tarō: “Ah!” Everyone: “Little – Ah!”
Jack: “And you got a cute cat so…No, nah, you’re still doing it.” Jack: “You’re still doing the meme. Get outta here” Jack: “Where we dropping?” Jack: “It’s Japanese Zenyatta” (it’s an ad for “Pip Elekiban”, which are magnetic patches that treat muscle stiffness)
God of magnetism: “Go up! Go up!” (raising the magnetic field strength)
*on screen*: magnetic field strength (in millitesla) Lady: “Ah…It’s amazing!”
God of magnetism: “It’s amazing, right?”
Lady: “More! More!” God of magnetism: “Okay, this is the maximum” (reaching 200 millitesla) Jack: *laughs* “Oh my God”
Announcer: “New product – Pip Elekiban max 200”
*on screen* The greatest magnetic field strength in the history of Pip Elekiban Jack: “What the fuck? Ohh, man, that’s weird. Imagine what that sounds like from outside the door” Jack: *in Japanese* “Ah… It’s amazing! It feels goooood!” *owl hooting* Elderly man: “Is it full moon tonight?” Younger man: “Ah, ah, ahhhh…” Jack: “Oh, God”
Elderly man: “What happened?” Younger man: “When I look at the full moon, I- (change into a)” Jack: “Why did you tell me about the moon? I’m a werewolf, dude!”
Elderly man: “Fox? Raccoon?”
Younger man: “A wolf!” Elderly man: “Is it a fox or a raccoon?”
Younger man: “A wolf!!!!!”
Elderly man: “That’s not it!” Elderly man: “Red fox or green racoon, I’m asking which one you want to eat!” (“Red fox” and “Green racoon” are different types of cup noodles sold under the brand “Maru-chan”) Younger man: “Do I have to choose now!?” *howls* Announcer: “Maru-chan: ‘Red fox’ and ‘Green racoon’ ” Jack: “Yeah, a good message for the kids: eat your noodles or turn into a werewolf” Jack: “It’s like when they told you that if you keep masturbating you’ll get hairy hands” Jack: “Well, you know what? I got fucking hairy hands anyway” Jack: “probably from all the masturbating” *laughs* Jack: “Ok, well, that does it for this episode of ‘Jacksepticeye’s funniest home videos’ ” Jack: “Thank you, elves, for going out and procuring all of those wonderful videos for us” Jack: “I hope you laughed, I hope you cried, I hope you thought about your place in the universe…I hope you did your taxes as well, actually. Jack: “I hope that you’re actually, like, paying your way forward… You know, I hope that you’re just doing good in life. I hope that you’re reaching for the stars” Jack: “You know what, if you miss the stars, at least you might hit a planet or something- find new life” Jack: “That analogy kinda got off the rails, but…” Jack: “GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!” *outro music plays* Jack: “What a fucking weird episode” *laughs*


100 thoughts on “FUNNIEST JAPANESE COMMERCIALS | Jacksepticeye’s Funniest Home Videos

  1. Screw it I’ve searched half the internet to find this sound effect but I can’t find it so can someone tell me where the sound effect at 2:47 s from?

  2. Sean. You can't do a video featuring weird Japanese commercials without including the old ones with Arnold Schwarzenegger. Those were hilarity GOLD. "Woohee Boohee!"

  3. Hey jacksepticeye after watching this video of I got to the highest bed in my whole house and just jumped off the cuz that's how weird that got then I done something over again and again pictures Lodge but I don't care it's way better than watching all this man turning into chicken with their sing whole bunch of chickens that sing also it might be scream I don't know which and you definitely need some of those chickens then never title of video can I have a chicken on it and that start of the video you can have ten thousand chickens goingbooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooc

  4. jack: Its like when they told you if you masturbate too much you'll get hairy hands

    jack: well guess what I already have fucking hairy hands …
    Probably from all the masturbating 😂

    ( why is no one talking about this )

  5. I would like to mention that before the video even STARTED, I saw a commercial with some pregnant lady screaming in a car. I don't even know what I was being sold.

  6. Hey, Jack. Just wanted to say thanks a bunch.
    Whenever I have a nightmare or when I'm feeling paranoid at night or just whenever I'm feeling down, I find my fingers pretty much going "Whelp, gOOD OL' JACKABOI'S VIDEOS CAN CURE THIS!" And I'm laughing in minutes. Keep doin what you do. You're the best.

  7. When i was in Primary school my gym teacher had that chicken thing and he would squeeze it to make the P1s shut up 😂

  8. 10:30
    My grandma has one of those rubber chicken things, and it's hilarious. She said she uses it to scare the racoons
    off of her porch. I love squeezing it every time I come over. 😄😂

  9. Jack: don’t give me those eyes they turn me on
    camera turns to an older man in a Japanese school girl outfit
    Jack: NOW I SEE WHY

  10. 3:34 I felt like someone was shoving a needle slowly into my forehead directly above and between my eyes when watching this.

  11. Jack: I hope you did your taxes.

    Me: a 12 year old who’s more concerned about how much food their gonna take to school tomorrow

  12. I have three rubber chickens that scream that's what they're called rubber chickens sell them you for something that only Ireland or England has

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