This Bug’s Bite Will Make You ALLERGIC TO RED MEAT
05
November

By Adem Lewis / in , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , /


Joe: Hey guys, I’m Joe Bereta, and today,
I’m taking a stance. And here it is: Ticks can go to hell and die. Forever. I know, I
know, it’s a pretty extreme point of view but, seriously, F ticks. First of all, they’re
external parasites, which means not only do they thrive at the expense of an unfortunate
host, but you can see them do it. That’s rude. At least internal parasites retain the
common decency to shutter their disgusting, non-mutual symbiotic actions away from our
delicate sensibilities. Not ticks though. They’re all like, look at me, I’m feasting
on a dish called you and I’m gonna get fat like chick from Sliver. Good movie. 2nd of
all, they’re arachnids. Which means they’re part of the same family of evil and nightmares
as, this guy, and this guy, and this guy, and this thing. Ew. Thirdly, ticks harbor
a slew of horrible diseases that can change your life the worse, in an instant, with just
one stupid, little tick bite. One of my good friends, who goes by the name Jonathon Wikipedia
told me that ticks can transfer things like Lyme disease, Q fever  Colorado tick fever, Rocky
Mountain spotted fever, African tick bite fever, rabbit-fever tick-borne relapsing
fever, babesiosis (ba-bees-iosis) ehrlichiosis(air-lick-iosis), Tick paralysis,  tick-borne meningoencephalitis(men-ingo-enceph-alitis),
bovine anaplasmosis and the Heartland virus. And now, ticks are infecting my news feed
because a certain tick, known as the Lone Star Tick, seems to be on the rise. Here’s
why the Lone Star Tick is a butthole: Its bite can make you allergic to red meat. And
more and more cases of people magically becoming allergic to red meat are popping up from the
south, to the southeast, and up the east coast, all the way to Maine. Waking up and suddenly
not being able to sink my teeth into a succulent sirloin is just as horrifying as waking up
and finding I lost the ability to hug my own children. It’s not that I don’t love my
beautiful kids endlessly, it’s that I love steak that friggin much. The culprit inside
the culprit here is a sugar called alpha-gal. It naturally occurs in red meat, but not in
our flesh, human bodies. When the lone star tick latches on, it squirts alpha-gal into
the bloodstream, and the body freaks out and is like, that’s not supposed to be here
so the body fights back and creates anti-boddies to battle the sugar. After that, when you
eat the meat, the body also fights the sugars in the meat, resulting in allergic reactions
as mild as hives and swelling, to more extreme fare, like a lack of breath, vomiting, diarrhea,
and a drop in blood pressure. Things can get anaphylactic too, resulting in the friendly
plunge of an epi-pin. As a rule, if the things you do in life result in somebody needing
to use an epi-pen, you’re a dick. Ticks are dicks. Lone Star Dick. To top everything
off here, some people have recovered from the red meat allergy. And others haven’t.
It’s a roll of the dice as to if you get better or not. No more BBQs. No more carne
asada. No more ham-burgers. My heart hurts for these people. But that also might be from
all the red meat I eat. Guys, lets say you were bit by a disgusting tick…after your
heebie jeeebies cleared up, what would you not want to be magically allergic to….please
enlighten me down below.


100 thoughts on “This Bug’s Bite Will Make You ALLERGIC TO RED MEAT

  1. Great video. I'm actually a victim of the lonestar tick. Happened about 3 years ago, to be exact,and I've been trying to keep friends and family informed of the lonestar tick issue ever since. The positive news is that my symptoms were light compared to many others, but I essentially had to say bye-bye to red meat (bacon, burgers, ribs….) for a good 2 1/2 years before attempting to really start eating red meat again. It does get better for those of us who had lighter symptoms. I can eat light amounts of beef and pork with only minor issues on occasion now, but I can't go back to the almost daily beef eating habits I was on. It's…depressing. 

  2. I'd Be pissed and ill fuck something up. dont know what might just be a bank cause i like money and why not fuck shit up and get money.

  3. I wouldn't want to be allergic to freaking red meat! And sushi of any kind, chocolate, nuts of any kind, oatmeal, quinoa, caramel, coconut, fruit of any kind… Basically I don't want food allergies at all!

  4. I've been allergic to red meat for my entire life! Now I'm wondering if thats a genetic thing or if some dick of a lonestar tick bit me when i was a baby! 

  5. Being allergic to red meat would definitely be depressing.  Even worse for me would be if I was suddenly allergic to all sugar, so that I could never eat any sweet foods or drinks again.  

  6. If I was allergic to SourceFed I would cry for 40 days and 40 nights.

    Then I'd go watch Elliott's Happy Hour or something. 🙂

  7. Jk not duh butt, if I became allergic to an internal hormone then that would be my worst fear. I'm a developing teen for gods sake!

  8. Pasta in general.
    or if more specific then Alfredo ingredients as well.  to not have that creamy taste again would be horrible.

  9. The tick isn't being a dick, it's helping you stay away from heart disease and leading a better dietary life. by force XD

  10. There's a tick that makes you allergic to hamberjers…… Nope. No no no no no. Never going outside again. 

  11. I'd appreciate not being allergic to air, second to that would be my own body….imagine destroying yourself from the inside out. 

  12. ice cream…. OH GOD NOT ICE CREAM or Coffee…. OH GOD NOT COFFEE or even worse…coffee flavor ice cream … OH GOD NOT COFFEE FLAVOR ICE CREAM! >_<

  13. I get bit by these things about twice a year and 2 years ago i became allergic to 11 foods including red meat. All of them anaphylactic… 

  14. i would not like to be allergic to shellfish… i use to eat a lot of it before until of course that time i had shrimp fried rice and had to rushed to the hospital. my tongue got so big it blocked my airways & couldnt breathe… now i walk around with an epi-pen 🙁

  15. Well randomly being allergic to things has happened to me before. I've had allergies all my life. I used to be allergic to dairy, eggs, all nuts, all seafood, and latex. NOW, I'm allergic to dairy, eggs, all nuts, all seafood, tropical fruits (specifically mango, kiwi, papaya, watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew, coconuts, and bananas), sesame seeds, basil (the fresher it is, the worse the reaction), and latex. So, if a tic is ever discovered that can reverse any of these, please let me know. All of those "extreme" reactions Joe mentioned are things I experience whenever any small amount of these items enters my body. I went to London last week and ordered a Whiskey Sour at a bar. In the US, these don't contain eggs so I didn't think to ask what was in it, but in London, they do, which I discovered the hard way after having three sips. Needless to say, I was violently vomiting all night long. It's pretty scary when your vomit isn't stopping so as to allow you to breathe. Sorry for the TMI, but allergies are serious, and people often don't realize how serious they can be. If I had a fourth or fifth sip, I most likely would've needed the EpiPen and to go to the hospital. 

  16. I would hate to be allergic to bird poop, I'd be that guy who freaks out and crumbles onto the floor dead because some bird shat on him.

  17. As mutch as i would hate to loose red meat. It would really suck to be allergic to… Well, actualy… red meat is a pretty terrible thing to be allegic to

  18. Water. Its probably impossible for something to make me allergic to water. But people can be allergic to water, and it sucks.

  19. Water. Its probably impossible for something to make me allergic to water. But people can be allergic to water, and it sucks.

  20. I'm allergic to red meat a tick is how I got it let me tell you something IT SUCKS BAD I can't even tell you what a hamburger,stake,bacon,or pork taste like!!!!😡 my mom and father make me eat turkey bacon(it sucks because it's NOT BACON) they give me a lot of turkey I've eaten so much turkey even the pilgrims fill bad for me!#fromARKANSAS

  21. i have tangled with tick born illness not once but twice and no its not so fun i wanted to do it again! the 1st time souldnt have been tick season so when i forgot the OFF i was like euh its should be fine WRONG a few days to a week later i was SICK and the crazy thing i never seen the tick but got a bullseye rash and developed the mammal allergy not just red meat you can even become allergic to dairy and your pets cats dogs horses ect! then on a river clean up i was like NOT TODAY TICKS soaked my self in the bug spray the clean up crew had and i had to have sweated off all the spray and went through a nest of baby ticks cause i was covered in tiny tiny ticks that i thought was spiders so i was tossing them out the window going home and i get in the shower and i noticed i had tiny tiny specks still stuck on my skin! got sick again and my mammal allergy may have became worse than before cause now i cant eat pork [NO BACON!!!! :'( ] or any food cooked in lard or AVoil which is animal vegetable oil blend!!! so no fries unless i make them myself….. on the plus side you can eat poultry and fish and i love seafood… but i have to watch preservatives and food spice and flavorings cause those products can have mammal in them,,
    on the plus side i have to eat healthier but its a pain to not get to eat out without worrying if later that night
    (because its a delayed reaction most of the time!) will i be puking or pooping my brains out and having hot and cold sweats just cause some worker dont know what is really in the food they serve … band aids some soaps shampoos lotions dairy anything with mammal products even jello and processed sugar had mammal in it!!!!
    im not offended by your vid i like that you make it funny so maybe people will listen better than if it was a dull public announcement or if it was in medical language that makes your eyes glass over and i concur ticks are dicks!!!!

  22. I have this allergy after one bite… Thanks for making this video…It helps with awareness and your comedy is appreciated.

  23. fake ass bullshit i dont believe any of this i got bitten by one and still eat red meat. get rid of this video please your making me allergic to vegetables

  24. I'm an ethical vegetarian. serves you meat eating ticks right. natural selection for the win! I hope all meat eaters get bitten.

  25. So i went to camp last week and someone mentioned this without mentioning the type of tick, later that week i got a lone star tick on my leg. Even later that week i felt like i had hives but people said i didn't. Crap

  26. This is what keeps a meat lovers like me up at night! Tick sneaks up on me. Aaaahhhhhhhhhh my nightmares!!!!!!!!

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